I love to argue, and while clearly that love has led to some unlpeasant consequence, it is still something which I be quite passionate about. Ever heard of “excess individuation”? I heard of it to describe depression, and find it quite apt. I’d attack, and others would withdraw, leaving me feeling isolated, and trying to make sense of it. Since, in arguing, I was merely asking nothing I wouldn’t ask of myself, I think you can imagine how angry and frustrated I became.
Refusal to engage my arguments left me feeling unloved, disrespected, uncared for, and in time, began to show it. Arguing with my family is far from the only thing I’ve argued about, you know, and and certainly not the most engaging topic, and while my breakdown centered on family, the issues came to alienation on a hit-the-wall scale.
Passion pushes me to articulate, to challenge myself, to challenge others, why is it any difference in others, I thought? Yes, I push, but why not shove right on back, instead of run away? I guess that’s where empathy has broken down, but it’s not an unbridgeable gap, I’ll wager.
I think I could teach someone to argue with me in a suitable, respectable way with me. The said individual simply hasta be open-minded to the possibly that the shrink-think concept of disengagement is as cruel, disrespectful, and hurtful as I think is.
I’ll betcha teaching this has much in common with learning the proper instincts in sparring. Emotion fuels sparring, and I can’t see why it’s deemed undesiarble in the drive for logical debate. If emotion drives you to form an argument out of whatever logic structure you’re battling out of, ain’t that good?
I think so. Yeah, sometimes, we just passionately disagree, but can’t think of a good reason, at the moment, and instead of admitting that you foe’s thoughts carry the day ‘cuz you’re outta ammo turn spiteful, but that’s just part of the challenge, as I see it. Sparring, at any rate, when both actors know, and follow the rules, becomes a lot like ballet, and arguing, I think, can, and should, be likewise.
At any rate, I need to find someone to train to find out if I’m right. I’ll certainly share with you all the results.